she speaks: natasha hemmingway on mindset barriers, imposter syndrome, and why women need to embrace talking about money
- steph nagl
- Mar 28
- 6 min read
To celebrate Women History’s Month, toth shop sat down with different women to hear their experiences, insights, and lessons on topics that matter the most.
Natasha Hemmingway is a seasoned sales consultant, coach, and speaker. As the creator of Heart Not Hustle®️, she empowers corporations, startups, and entrepreneurs to master authentic sales processes and strategies that lead to meaningful success. She is a dear friend of toth shop who has worked with our leadership team on how we approach selling, but, more importantly, how we understand toth shop’s value and, even MORE importantly, how we feel our own worth as women.
toth shop:
what are some of the most common mindset barriers you see women face when it comes to pricing their services or asking for higher pay?
Natasha Hemmingway (NH):
I think one of the biggest things is that we don't value ourselves and the gift that we carry. A lot of times we see the thing that we do as, ‘it's not a big deal.’ When we don't value it, no one else will. If you don't value it, no one else will. So, we get caught up in the way that we view things and then we think and we put that same lens or filter on how we think other people will receive it, whether it's a boss or a client that you're wanting to buy from you. That lack of self-worth is always an internal thing. It starts within us, and it's the mindset. I always say, you never do anything absent from your mindset. So if you don't believe, your client won't believe. If you don't believe it, your boss is not going to believe it.
toth shop:
how can women overcome these barriers?
(NH):
You need to be self-aware. I always say self-awareness is the biggest gateway to growth. We have to be able to acknowledge where our gaps are or where we struggle, and then we need to be able to obviously start working on it. It’s a work in progress because you're never going to reach some pinnacle where you're like,”oh my gosh, I so believe in myself.”
I also always tell my clients that it is important to seek wise counsel. You should not share your hopes and dreams with anybody and everybody because everybody doesn't see you the way that maybe you want them to see you. It's important that when you are creating something new or you are rising up into another level or you are wanting to achieve something, the people that are around you and the people who are willing to speak into you when you don't even have the belief yourself. I've been there. It took my mom and it took my husband to speak into me and to remind me of who I am and what I'm capable of. And when you have people around you like that, your belief system starts to say, “You know what? I am worthy of that. I am good at that. Other people do value that.” Let me shift my mindset and then see what happens. It's amazing when I watch clients start to own their gifting and their expertise and stand in their confidence because you can ask for an increase, you can go get more money, but first—do you believe it? And are you willing and capable to articulate it from a place of competencies and grace.
toth shop:
how can women navigate self-doubt or imposter syndrome when stepping into leadership or negotiating in a male dominated workplace?
(NH):
Imposter syndrome is that thing that tells us we're not good enough.The subconscious is of or concerning the part of the mind, which one is not fully aware of, but which affects one's feelings and actions. So, it's that creepy little thing that you go to do something and you're like, “I'm not good enough.” It's that little creepy little silent voice. I'm a firm believer in understanding the mind and how it works. It's also understanding where your fears rise up because a lot of us carry things that have happened to us in our past. We all pick up these little life events that affect us differently. What happens is you have this life event and then the next thing that usually rises up is the fear. The fear is that thing that traps you. I think it's really important to understand what real fear and false fear is because fearlessness doesn't exist. So stop waiting on it.
It's all about how do you move through your fear and acknowledge that it's there and do the work that's necessary for you to rise into that. That way you are able to make better choices from a place of truth versus fear.
toth shop:
what does it look like to make a choice from a place of truth instead of fear?
(NH):
Ask yourself this one question: “Is it true that you are not capable of whatever the thought is that you think you can do?” 99.999% of the time, the answer is no. It's not true because you haven't even done it yet. You haven't even attempted it. Even if you did, there's still an opportunity to grow. So if it's not true, then you have no choice but to move forward.
Taking action really does help rewire those neuro pathways where you start creating this new pathway, and you actually have that proof of concept like, “Oh, I am capable of taking even these small steps.” So, I believe that it is 1000% the things that have happened to us, our belief system, and then committing yourself to changing it and doing the work. A lot of times we just keep going and going and going and going and spinning and spinning and spinning with the same subconscious, negative thoughts. That does not get you anywhere. So you have to change it.
toth shop:
what’s the biggest mindset shift women need to make to help improve their sales?
(NH):
What I see most and how it affects their sales literally goes back to the belief system. And what ends up happening is, let's say it's an entrepreneur or business owner, it's like they have this brilliant, creative idea to offer. But their belief is, “Oh, I'm not really in sales. I don't sell anything. I'm not a salesperson. I'm just kind of out here doing it.” And I'm like, “No, you are in sales, and you have to own that.” You have to start working through to get the skillset.
Sales is not a personality trait. I wasn't born good at sales. It's a skillset. So anybody has the opportunity to be better at sales. First, you have to acknowledge that this is your role and say, “I am championing this business, this service, this product.” That mindset has to be there. Then, you have to do the work of understanding and building out, especially if you're a business owner, building out the sales process for the business and the sales strategy and the confidence to be able to articulate whatever you're selling from a place of competencies and grace, because no one is going to buy from you if you don't even believe that you're worthy of it.
toth shop:
why is it important for women to embrace talking about money?
(NH):
Money is not bad. What you do with it can be good or bad, but money is just an amplifier. It's an opportunity to actually do more good. As females, we do big things with money. We give other people opportunities. We actually allow another stay-at-home mom to work in our business or our job in a contract role. Or if you are a business owner and you are increasing your profits and you are growing and you are scaling, it means basically you get to serve more people.
There are people out there that need what you have, and they can't buy it if there's no value placed on it. There is a real sell psychology thing with buyers. When something is too cheap, they think something's wrong with it, and they won't buy it. Literally they won't buy it. So our buying habits, the way we see money, all of that affects us.
As women, we need to rise into that to know that it is okay to make more money because it gives you the opportunity to do more good, to impact more people, to serve more people, to reach more people.
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